last saturday something unique happened in denmark
the government started collecting taxes on fat
not fat people, there are none there, no...
the new law specifically targets saturated fats
fats found most commonly in animal products like
butter, cream, and meat - what about peanut butter...
are the danes facing an era of dry toast...
consumers saw a sudden jump in the cost of many
of their favorite bread-friendly products
the average price increase was a whopping 35%
don't even think about cooking with lard
lard is now the governments public enemy number one
if you're caught cooking with lard, it's prison
this is like prohibition in the US in the 20s
bootlegged butter and cheese will be served in
secret hangouts called spread easys
and every local hood will get into the new business
of supplying the hungry public with cans of
contraband whipped cream and other creamy delights
there'll be a whole new meaning to the term 'pat-down'
the public will not stand for this new law
as with all new laws, the government didn't ask anybody
they just did what they thought was a good thing
without thinking how this will effect us or businesses
well, i'll tell ya there's gonna be a big increase in crime
an unpopular law is never followed
THIS ARTICLE WAS DICTATED ON MY CELL PHONE WHILE I WAS DRIVING
