Friday, March 16, 2012

FEELING YOUNG IN THE NEW WORLD

it's hard to feel young when your knees

are always cracking, even when you're not moving

but recently, i just moved to a whole new world

it's the desert and i'll tell you, it's very different

i feel great... young and alive

out here the average age is dead

people here, both men and women are all silver

they drive real slow and walk with walkers and mutter

since i've moved here i feel bad about illegally parking

in the handicap spaces, there are people here who

really need 'em, because if they're out in the sun

for too long... they'll catch on fire

i came from a town where half the people were hip and gay

these people need new hips and ben-gay

the best part is that i feel so young

no matter how many body aches i have

i still can kick any body's butt around here

the real let down, among others, is online dating

even the feeble old ladies muster up enough energy

to go online and post disgusting details about their

needs and their availability, it's really pretty sick

now i'm not above extending some elderly mercy

but when all the available ladies have denture breath


- that ain't gonna happen