so
in this crazy
mixed-up world
where up is down
and black is white (or in jail)
there are some things that are just plain unchangeable
there are some things that i can count on
these things keep the world livable and spinning
one of these go-to dependables is doritos brand tortilla chips
through my entire life these little chips have made life livable
first taco flavored then nacho cheese flavored and now
the sheer delight of cool ranch flavored doritos
but, as you can see, recently something has changed
now, along with everything else in life
these innocent little delights are being politicized
and with the rest of the new american culture
are being rammed down my throat
and i'm forced to acknowledge diversity
the fact that doritos cool ranch come now in all the
colors of the rainbow makes me wanna just give-up
but to give-up on dorito would mean to give-up on life itself
so the only real option left for me is to o d on doritos
that's right
just gorge on these little rainbows until i explode
just end it and go out in flood of sodium
it's not that i'm homophobic
as a matter of fact i'm hobophobic
i just can't stand free loaders on freight trains any longer
and that's another problem that i will do without
good-bye cruel world
oh, pass the bean dip while you're at it
