100 MILLION SOLD IN THE FIRST 10 WEEKS!
doritos are awesome, especially the nacho cheese doritos
so is licking off the cheesy residue that sticks to
your fingers
it's like you get a bonus for eating these dusted delights
it's like frito-lay is saying, 'great job finishing our bag of
doritos, but wait, there's
more... look at your fingers!'
here's another bonus... the same happens with the
company's cheetos brand cheese flavored cheese puffs too
not so awesome is when you forget your fingers are
saturated in this permanent, cheesy residue
you do the classic shirt rub-off that you do when you eat
it's normally a great feeling, cleaning your hands
of crumbs with just one swipe on the shirt
but in this case, you forget that these aren't just any
ordinary crumbs, no this stuff is like radiation
you have to attend a class and go through a 12-part
cleaning process plus 3 days of push broom showers
but to millions, orange fingers is little to pay for all that
cheesy goodness, and that's cheesy goodness that lasts
but now, you can get that cheese fix while eating your taco
this seems like a breakthrough to many and the savior
of the american economy, adding millions of new jobs
imagine all the open positions available for taco benders
but for some of us, this has been going on for years
i've always eaten nacho flavored doritos with my tacos
and have usually knocked out the taco filling and scooped
it up with my doritos, usually with 2, thus making a taco
so yet again the fast food industry is making a killing
on stealing food service innovations from yours truly
you're welcome america, it's my pleasure serving you
but i will never let you know what i do with cheese whiz
that would cause such a upheaval, the frenzy might
have an apocalyptic negative effect on most everything
in the meantime, just suck on those orange fingers
