europe is facing a crisis that cannot be ignored
of course i'm referring to norway's crippling butter shortage
according to fox news, the entire country of norway is
facing a butter shortage because of a new fad diet
- a high fat, low carb diet, the country's stockpile of butter
is gone, norway has no butter
and they have no hope of replenishing their butter reserves
...considering how difficult it is to milk reindeer
- they try, but they keep flying away
with butter going for over $740 per box
it's no wonder that on friday, a russian man was caught
trying to smuggle 90 kilos of butter over the swedish border
... 90 kilos of butter, or roughly the equivalent
of one cinnabun
norway is about to be over run by the butter cartels
desperate butter mules will be swallowing condoms
filled with sticks of land o lakes
butter kingpins will be spreading their wares in the streets
of oslo to desperate addicts tweaking on shortbread
unlike norway, we in america live in a buttertopia
here, we've got stick butter, tub butter, whipped butter,
honey butter and even spray butter, we have so many
kinds of butter, that we have produced a product that's
called - i can't believe it's not butter...
we have so much butter, that at state fairs
we carve it to look like celebrities
and deep fry whole sticks of it in other butter
yes, america has happy cows and plenty of butter
we try fad diets too,
but we always go back to our old favorites
like butter
and you can see, that here in america
the pounds just melt away
SOURCE: THE COLBERT REPORT
